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How do You Wish Happy Birthday When You Don’t Want to?

beer umbrella

Does it really matter?

When her mother left her while she was young, she didn’t realise that it would mark an unexpected turning point in her life where enough is enough and how different her life was going to be.

Even though there was regular arguing between her parents and they always drank, her immediate thought was finally some peace and stability.

Everything else would remain the same, but would it?

Unexpected Responsibilities

unexpected responsibilities marks as a turning point in life of this girl

Birthdays were acknowledged for the girl; just without fanfare. 

One thing that she didn’t see coming was how needed she would be by her father over the next 5 years. 

Her baby sister had come home.  Her mother was in no condition to look after a baby. So her father did the brave thing and rescued the baby. Although he had no idea how he would manage his life—work and family—. 

And that was just the beginning in this ‘new’ life. 

A few more curved balls were on the way for the girl and overnight, she went from a young person to an adult.

Her responsibility was to collect her baby sister from the neighbour when she arrived home from school.

The Weight of Duty

teen cleaning the house was one of her turning point in life

As well as completing her homework, the girl was to ensure there was milk and bread for everybody, including her brothers, who also returned home after spending a year without school or rules.

Her baby sister was to be bathed as well as ensure the house was relatively clean for when her father came home from the local hotel around six.

Fortunately, there was some relief when a live-in housekeeper was found. But six weeks or so later, her father made advances towards each one so they left as soon as possible.

This meant the girl was back to the original routine, which continued until her sister went to school, which coincided with the girl leaving school as soon as possible.

So much for the expectation of life settling down. Nothing stayed the same! 

No wonder the woman dreaded and baulked at change in her adult years.

Enduring Emotional Strain

sad girl on the floor

The curved balls continued to grow larger. And then the day came that she would regret her words for the rest of her life. 

The teen had upset her father so from that moment on, it didn’t seem to matter how much she tried to win him over with everything being done every day. Her homework was completed, along with securing excellent grades, the house was clean, no washing left on the line; and her sister was bathed—clean and ready for bed.

Nothing she did would please him. The extra effort didn’t matter to him.

She had fallen off his pedestal, so after a few years, she began to shield her heart. But out of the respect that she was taught, she’d tolerate his unfounded accusations while waiting for him to forgive her. 

The Turning Point in Life

Ten or so years would pass, and although it was difficult to push the hurt and pain aside, she still held hope, so she would visit for his birthday, Father’s Day, Christmas Day, or even pop in if she was passing. 

Sometimes he was civil so would talk to her. 

Other days, he was too busy with friends. And he worked out a way to embarrass her again. But out of respect and not wanting to create a scene with guests, she simply took another blow.

The woman would feel the pain in the pit of her stomach and be emotionally distraught as she headed home. 

Christmases were always bleak but again, with hope and out of respect, she reluctantly visited him, even though the woman knew what to expect so her character had grown defensive. 

One year, the Christmas present was an umbrella which had a beer brand promoted on it. She quickly learnt that it was a giveaway when anyone purchased two or more cartons of that particular brand of beer.

In his eyes, the young married woman was non-existent, to the point of claiming to others (including her adult children 30 years on) that she was not his daughter.

When Enough is Enough

enough is enough girl palm facing forward

Enough! She’d had enough. This cruelty must stop!

The woman realised that she was much happier when her father wasn’t in her life.

(Decades later, she learnt that her father was self-absorbed. So from his perspective, this teen’s mistake was an act that misled and deceived him, which is totally unforgivable.)

It all made perfect sense. And although she is curious to know what happened to him as a child, she has learnt so much about herself and is no longer afraid to love and express love to friends and family.

Her life trajectory has changed. She is happier than she has ever felt, manifesting and travelling the world, feeling free and excited about what the future holds for her.  

Everyone has a story, and for so many people, there are so many reasons to inspire and experience a great turning point in life. It’s important to share, as you’ll never know who will need to read it.

For another inspiring story, click here to read it.

If this story resonated with you, you may send me an email at donna@mydreambox.me or send your enquiry to our contact page.

Here’s another interesting story, click here.

Copyright © 2024 Donna Arnold. All rights reserved.

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